Ok, James here. Before I start accepting dictation on today’s entry I’d like you to know that it is not my fault that it has been three days since the last entry. Yes I do have a life of sorts, and yes I have been quite busy in it, but the fact is that the little fella just hasn’t been forthcoming in producing another entry over the last few days. Various reasons, actually – as I’m sure you’ll find out when he arrives – but it’s mostly just tiredness on his part. He runs around so much during the day that when I’m ready to take dictation in the evening he’s usually flat on his back, legs akimbo, white-socked feet in the air, sawing logs, catching zees, as it were, if you will, so to speak. I have mentioned this to him, and he has promised to try to be more diligent. Ah, here he is now, just returning from a bathroom break.
Ok, where was I? Oh, right. I liked our walk the other night, about 930, when Jay seemed to be in a very great hurry for some reason. The sky was dark, and there were a lot of things flying everywhere – wrappers, leaves, even branches! I tried to catch them all, but it was crazy – they were flying in all different directions and at all different speeds – like there was a different wind for each of them – so I just couldn’t. At the time this made me mad, but I’m over it now. Now I actually laugh at my silliness.
That was the quickest walk I’ve been on – down the road to Maple, over to Meadow, then up the alley again and home. Jay put me in my pen as soon as we got home, and seemed quite insistent that I “do the deed” just as soon as I could. Of course, I was more interested in playing; my walk cut short, I still had energy to burn off, and I had trouble understanding why Jay had been in such a hurry to almost run around the block with me.
This playwish seemed to exasperate Jay, which of course made it all the more fun for me. He started exhorting me: “Come on Rusty, go poops. Go POOPS Rusty!” and so on and so forth. Still I just wanted to play so I crouched down, barked really loud, growled just the right amount, fashionably speaking, and looked at him sheepishly right in the eye.
Just then, large wet things started hitting the ground around me. One, two, three, and more, then lots more all around. Some of them even landed on me, which made me wonder what was going on. I felt myself getting wet then, and I started to understand the shortened, quickened walk. It was like bathtime, but outside.
Jay picked me up to take me quickly in the house and as he carried me up the steps I looked up in the sky where I could see hundreds, no thousands, of those thick, wet things falling out of a deep grey cloud. At the same time all the nearby trees were bucking and swaying wildly, as if in fear of some oncoming meteorological affront.
Once inside I saw a bright flash throughout the kitchen, and there was a really loud noise that frightened me a little – though not much because I’m so brave. I looked at Jay for reassurance, but Jay didn’t even seem to have noticed it. I looked across the room at Em, and saw him looking quizzically out the front window.
“It’s raining,” he said.
“Tell me about it,” Jay replied, wiping water off his glasses.
I made a little noise in sympathy, something like “Rroawwrrrr,” and they both looked at me and laughed.
That was, of course, the very moment that I realized I had to go pee after all.
Can anyone lend me a rain coat?